I don't know if it's just that I didn't grow up in a high school environment like the one in which I currently work, or if these kids really are this lame, but there are former students constantly just showing up to visit and/or help teach classes. There are two former dance students that show up - one is here nearly every day and graduated at least five years ago, because he wasn't a student here when I began teaching. There is a former orchestra student leading a sectional in the hallway in front of my office door right now. There are CONSTANTLY former band students showing up, but more so when we are in marching band season. They come, walk around on the practice field and shout at current students comparing them to the "glory days" and how band "use to be." I find it irritating. Well, I find it more than irritating, but I don't know what word to use that isn't melodramatic.
I have had a former student or two show up to my class, but they usually only come once or twice and then they stop and I believe it's because they don't know the current students, the current students don't know them (and quite frankly don't care to know them) and thereis nothing for them to do while I'm teaching.
There is such an unhealthy stigma about what life after high school is supposed to be here in Hendersonville that I don't encourage students to come back for a visit. These kids are too unmotivated to actually leave when they graduate from high school and they are forever stuck in the mindset that everyone here at East will always remember them and all they accomplished while they were here... even the ones who didn't accomplish much. I always encourage my students to go as far away as they can to study. Of course, I'm usually just trying to convince them that college actually is a good idea.
I can't stand how unmotivated, entitled and apathetic the students are here at East. They are not not held responsible for anything, they get away with murder, they talk back to faculty, they don't study, they cheat on tests, they vandalize the campus, they encourage each other in the use of chewing tobacco because being a "rebel" is considered and all of this happens only when they decide to actually come to school. My advice for anyone with children or anyone thinking about starting a family to think more about private school. The public school system is crap.
I'm so tired of being here, I'm tired of being at this school and of being in the south where everyone is slow and aggressively ignorant. I'm tired of being embarrassed by the people around me and feeling like I need to constantly explain that we aren't all like that. What am I doing here and how the hell did I ever grow up in this environment? Sometimes I honestly feel like I'm being punished.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Friday, May 4, 2012
I admit it...
I know I'm am a complete and total nerd, but I am super excited...
I've been sorted into Slytherin House!
We are pleased.
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I've been sorted into Slytherin House!
We are pleased.
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Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Explanation, please.
So, all I keep hearing on the news is how many high school and middle school students are bringing guns to school, shooting and killing other students, having huge fights on buses and all sorts of other horrifying things that make me fear for my life. Then I began to wonder if any of this was being reflected in academics, so I put in a few more grades this morning to get things up to date, and here are the results (for a chorus class, mind you... chorus, wherein all you have to do is show up and sing a little):
In my first period alone, the grades break down as follows -
A - 2 students
B - 4 students
C - 9 students
D - 4 students
F - 12 students
I fear for my life because I babysit idiots. Idiots. Congratulations, parents - your kids are failing CHORUS!
In my first period alone, the grades break down as follows -
A - 2 students
B - 4 students
C - 9 students
D - 4 students
F - 12 students
I fear for my life because I babysit idiots. Idiots. Congratulations, parents - your kids are failing CHORUS!
Monday, February 27, 2012
Monday
I'm still trying to be as positive as I can be.
I had a conversation this morning with the student who failed to show up to a performance last week and she had no clue why I was upset or why she was in trouble. I explained it to her twice, and she still had no idea. In fact, before I dismissed her from my office altogether, she looked at me and said "I'm sorry I want to graduate." At least she saved me the agony of trying to decide whether or not to still give her an honor cord when she graduates this spring. She made that decision really easy.
I'm trying to get my kids ready for two events coming up very quickly: All-County Chorus and our first adjudicated contest at Brevard College. I'm worried. We are singing Sicut Cervus (the old, standard by Palestrina) and Sing Praises (another traditional work by Pfautsch). I'm not as worried about the modern piece as I am the Renaissance selection. I feel like I'm trying to teach monkeys how to sing in polyphony most days and it's really discouraging. I talk a big talk when it comes to the high school choral programs here in WNC, and this will be the first time my kids perform in front of these other schools, so we can't suck. Period. I own the fact that my motives for being great at this contest are selfish, but I want to prove a point and that point is that choral music is just as alive in Henderson County as it is in Buncombe County or any other neighboring county for that matter. I want my small program to step on stage and sparkle the whole time and I want a plaque that reads "Superior" on it. I just hope I can get these kids singing Palestrina backwards, forwards, sideways, up, down and with their eyes closed so that the clinicians don't have much to say.
I also want my kids to be more prepared for All-County than the other schools that will be present. Really it's only us and North Henderson High with one kid from Hendersonville High and one from West Henderson High... and I think one kids who is home-schooled. There just isn't enough time to cover all the music I have to cover over the next couple of weeks and I'm struggling trying to figure out how to manage it.
I'm not sure why, but I have one play list in iTunes that takes longer every time I try to burn it to disc. I've created a listening guide for my Music Appreciation students so they have something to take home and study, and I've discovered this strange occurrence the last few times I've made CDs. There are two play lists, therefore there are two CDs for each student and the first list burns just fine. Bu the second has increased it's burn time by a couple if minutes each go. iTunes. Ridiculous.
I'm tired and a little shakey. I had a cup of coffee for breakfast and a snadwich for lunch, and that's it.
Now, off to create a rubric for grading my music appreciation students' power point projects.
I had a conversation this morning with the student who failed to show up to a performance last week and she had no clue why I was upset or why she was in trouble. I explained it to her twice, and she still had no idea. In fact, before I dismissed her from my office altogether, she looked at me and said "I'm sorry I want to graduate." At least she saved me the agony of trying to decide whether or not to still give her an honor cord when she graduates this spring. She made that decision really easy.
I'm trying to get my kids ready for two events coming up very quickly: All-County Chorus and our first adjudicated contest at Brevard College. I'm worried. We are singing Sicut Cervus (the old, standard by Palestrina) and Sing Praises (another traditional work by Pfautsch). I'm not as worried about the modern piece as I am the Renaissance selection. I feel like I'm trying to teach monkeys how to sing in polyphony most days and it's really discouraging. I talk a big talk when it comes to the high school choral programs here in WNC, and this will be the first time my kids perform in front of these other schools, so we can't suck. Period. I own the fact that my motives for being great at this contest are selfish, but I want to prove a point and that point is that choral music is just as alive in Henderson County as it is in Buncombe County or any other neighboring county for that matter. I want my small program to step on stage and sparkle the whole time and I want a plaque that reads "Superior" on it. I just hope I can get these kids singing Palestrina backwards, forwards, sideways, up, down and with their eyes closed so that the clinicians don't have much to say.
I also want my kids to be more prepared for All-County than the other schools that will be present. Really it's only us and North Henderson High with one kid from Hendersonville High and one from West Henderson High... and I think one kids who is home-schooled. There just isn't enough time to cover all the music I have to cover over the next couple of weeks and I'm struggling trying to figure out how to manage it.
I'm not sure why, but I have one play list in iTunes that takes longer every time I try to burn it to disc. I've created a listening guide for my Music Appreciation students so they have something to take home and study, and I've discovered this strange occurrence the last few times I've made CDs. There are two play lists, therefore there are two CDs for each student and the first list burns just fine. Bu the second has increased it's burn time by a couple if minutes each go. iTunes. Ridiculous.
I'm tired and a little shakey. I had a cup of coffee for breakfast and a snadwich for lunch, and that's it.
Now, off to create a rubric for grading my music appreciation students' power point projects.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Positivity
Why is it so difficult to be positive? Conversely, why is it so easy to be negative? I am trying to be more positive and for several reasons, but mostly because I think that it will make life more tolerable.
Between yesterday and today I have been faced with some rather discouraging events and I'm desperately trying to find good in it. Last night a few of my students were supposed to perform on an arts gala helping support the eradication of Polio by way of the Rotary Club. There were two duets scheduled and one ensemble number and the kids were all aware of the date, time and my rules regarding performance attendance (we are, after all, a performance based elective). One of my advanced students, who had the biggest solo in the one ensemble number decided not to show up and I was made aware of her absence ten minutes before we sang by another student. So, I had to ask a kid who0 is not longer even in my program to cover the solo, and she screwed it up. I'm not angry about the mistake in the performance, because let's face it, a teenager who is willing to learn a solo ten minutes before a performance to cover someone else's ass is a pretty good kid in my book. Today I was ready to speak with the missing performer and had even calmed down and was going to be reasonable with her, but she was not at school. Then, second period happened.
My students in second period informed me that the missing performer had lied about her excuse for not showing up and the proof was all the photos she loaded onto facebook of her and her boyfriend on the night in question. Reason is now gone and I've been trying to figure out how to handle the situation without losing my job. By the way, did I mention that she is enrolled in my honors section? Then, to make matters worse, I had two more students who owed me a make-up test on some music they failed to pass last week. Only one of them showed up and guess what? She still didn't know the music. After she pretended to sing for the class (meaning she mumbled under her breath while I played the piano accompaniment), I asked her to follow me to my office. I had explained to her and the other kid who didn't come to class that this test would determine who participated in festivals this year and that they had better be prepared. I asked her to explain why she still didn't know the music and her response was that she did know the music, she just needed another student to sing with her so she could get it right. That's when I explained that I wasn't interested in students who can't sing for themselves and that I could not take her to contest simply because I can't trust her to learn the music. She said nothing. I think she thinks I'm kidding. The other kid will be tested on Monday and since he will have had three more days than I allotted, my standards will have risen. I will be more than pissed if I have to cut him because he is one of only three tenors. But, I suppose the lesson must be taught.
I've also had a few students come to me today and ask if they could have another shot at finishing an assignment from last week. You see, midterm reports went home yesterday and I only had about nine students out of 53 go home with an A. There may have been a B or two and the rest were Ds and Fs. Apparently, chorus is "real hard." The reason their grades suck is because they were unable to finish a word search with a sub while I was at honor choir. A WORD SEARCH. So, I guess their parents were pissed and have told them to get their rear-ends in gear. I hope so anyway. One parent was mad at me... until I called her and told her what was going on with her kid. Anyway, all this to say that I nearly laughed at the kids who said "can I do that word search again?" I explained that one shot was all they got and compared their inability to find words to that of a second grader.
I also got a random text from my sister with a short statement: family photos in Asheville on Saturday at 3:30. Was I ever consulted about scheduling a family photo session? Nope. Do I have the money to pay for gas to travel for an hour for said photos? Only if nine dollars can fill my tank. Do I plan on attending a photo session on Saturday? Not really, no.
I'm glad it's Friday and I'm glad my folks are coming to have dinner with me at my house. I'm also pretty excited about getting some rest. I'm praying for the ability to see the silver lining in the events of the past two days and the drama I'm about to encounter with my sister. Help me pray.
--- Addition ---
It is now nearly 6:00 pm, my parents just got here and shared some news; my dad has cancer again. Where is the silver lining? Where? Help me.
Between yesterday and today I have been faced with some rather discouraging events and I'm desperately trying to find good in it. Last night a few of my students were supposed to perform on an arts gala helping support the eradication of Polio by way of the Rotary Club. There were two duets scheduled and one ensemble number and the kids were all aware of the date, time and my rules regarding performance attendance (we are, after all, a performance based elective). One of my advanced students, who had the biggest solo in the one ensemble number decided not to show up and I was made aware of her absence ten minutes before we sang by another student. So, I had to ask a kid who0 is not longer even in my program to cover the solo, and she screwed it up. I'm not angry about the mistake in the performance, because let's face it, a teenager who is willing to learn a solo ten minutes before a performance to cover someone else's ass is a pretty good kid in my book. Today I was ready to speak with the missing performer and had even calmed down and was going to be reasonable with her, but she was not at school. Then, second period happened.
My students in second period informed me that the missing performer had lied about her excuse for not showing up and the proof was all the photos she loaded onto facebook of her and her boyfriend on the night in question. Reason is now gone and I've been trying to figure out how to handle the situation without losing my job. By the way, did I mention that she is enrolled in my honors section? Then, to make matters worse, I had two more students who owed me a make-up test on some music they failed to pass last week. Only one of them showed up and guess what? She still didn't know the music. After she pretended to sing for the class (meaning she mumbled under her breath while I played the piano accompaniment), I asked her to follow me to my office. I had explained to her and the other kid who didn't come to class that this test would determine who participated in festivals this year and that they had better be prepared. I asked her to explain why she still didn't know the music and her response was that she did know the music, she just needed another student to sing with her so she could get it right. That's when I explained that I wasn't interested in students who can't sing for themselves and that I could not take her to contest simply because I can't trust her to learn the music. She said nothing. I think she thinks I'm kidding. The other kid will be tested on Monday and since he will have had three more days than I allotted, my standards will have risen. I will be more than pissed if I have to cut him because he is one of only three tenors. But, I suppose the lesson must be taught.
I've also had a few students come to me today and ask if they could have another shot at finishing an assignment from last week. You see, midterm reports went home yesterday and I only had about nine students out of 53 go home with an A. There may have been a B or two and the rest were Ds and Fs. Apparently, chorus is "real hard." The reason their grades suck is because they were unable to finish a word search with a sub while I was at honor choir. A WORD SEARCH. So, I guess their parents were pissed and have told them to get their rear-ends in gear. I hope so anyway. One parent was mad at me... until I called her and told her what was going on with her kid. Anyway, all this to say that I nearly laughed at the kids who said "can I do that word search again?" I explained that one shot was all they got and compared their inability to find words to that of a second grader.
I also got a random text from my sister with a short statement: family photos in Asheville on Saturday at 3:30. Was I ever consulted about scheduling a family photo session? Nope. Do I have the money to pay for gas to travel for an hour for said photos? Only if nine dollars can fill my tank. Do I plan on attending a photo session on Saturday? Not really, no.
I'm glad it's Friday and I'm glad my folks are coming to have dinner with me at my house. I'm also pretty excited about getting some rest. I'm praying for the ability to see the silver lining in the events of the past two days and the drama I'm about to encounter with my sister. Help me pray.
--- Addition ---
It is now nearly 6:00 pm, my parents just got here and shared some news; my dad has cancer again. Where is the silver lining? Where? Help me.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
OH NOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Someone, please put a stop to the madness that is called Sleigh Bells!! And SNL, shame on you for scheduling them on one of the best episodes of your entire season.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
I'm So
TIRED!!! I took 21 students to the opera last night and didn't get to bed until after midnight. Several of the kids at school are sick, so my state of weakness set against the bugs going around is making me more and more nervous. I'm going home after school, taking some extra vitamins and going to bed. At least for a decent nap.
We saw Cosi last night at the Asheville Lyric. It was a pretty good performance. The lead soprano and mezzo were great, the supporting soprano was great (very funny) and the baritone was great. I've never cared much for tenors and the other baritone was irritating. I've never heard a "pro" opera singer with no squillo... at all. The kids (who had never even been to an opera before) commented on how it sounded like his voice was stuck inside his head or behind his tongue or something. I've also heard from the other cast members that he is no fun to work with and a real prima donna. That's just not good.
I think the kids enjoyed it though. At least, for the most part. They said that they thought it got a little slow from time to time, but that it was still really funny and the singing was good. I'm just doing whatever I can to get a little culture into these kids' lives before they leave and hopefully they will appreciate it one day.
My cabaret is tomorrow night and I just don't want to do it. I'm so tired, just the thought of having to do it makes me want to kill myself. It will be over soon though - I just need rest and something to eat.
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